Another Friday, another Life Chats. I'm currently writing this at my friend's apartment in the city and have temporarily made her living room my office space for the morning. I've got her whole apartment to myself right now [plus her dog, Eli] and just got back from a coffee walk, literally. I can't lie, kind of makes me feel like I live in New York already and I don't hate it. I always feel so at home when I am here, like it's just the right fit for me. Although taking that huge leap of faith to officially move here still scares the crap out of me. It's something that I believe in my heart I need to do for myself though. Several months back I did a LC post sharing some of my personal goals for this year and one of the things that I mentioned was moving into the city. While I am getting closer and closer to this goal of mine, it still feels a bit distant too. This year is halfway done and realistically I don't see it happening until 2017. If you live in New York or ever have before then you know how expensive it can be. A lot of people tend to have this love/hate relationship with it too. I know this is true for many of my friends. It's such an incredible place to be with so much opportunity, but it can also suck the life out of you. There's this constant hustle and bustle every day and sometimes, it's hard to keep up with this fast paced lifestyle. On the other hand though, it can also be very motivating and inspiring. It really is one of the best places to chase your dreams every single day until you catch them and live them.
One of the things that I have been struggling with lately is the fact that I want to do so much travel AND get my NYC apartment. I have this constant need and desire to just get up and go though. When I am in one place for too long, it's as if my body is just ready and willing to leave. I have such a free spirited soul and it just wants the ability to run wild and free everywhere in the world. To most people the obvious option would be to just keep saving up for my NYC apartment, but I feel like I still need to venture out a little more into the world before committing to a lease in the city. Not sure if this logic even makes sense to anyone other than me, but I feel like now is my time to do it while I have no attachments. I have been getting this feeling deep within me to do another solo journey. It's as if I need it again, to feel the way I felt when I was alone in Ireland. I do crave that solitude sometimes. I'm not a loner, but I've come to a point where I can truly appreciate just being by myself. I think it's so important to be comfortable enough to do things on your own and just for YOU. Ireland helped me to understand this better. I have been planning to visit London & Paris next month and for some reason I was hesitant on booking it all. I have no idea why and the longer I wait the more expensive this trip is going to be. I think I need to just go for it and start setting up my itinerary this week before I miss out on going altogether.
I was kind of in a funk over the past week or so and couldn't place my finger on the exact reason why. This tends to happen every so often and typically when it does, I share it with you all on here. It is not a good feeling to have because you start filling your mind with doubts. Blogging full time is always going to be a constant battle for me. It's getting used to the consistent inconsistency that can be difficult. There are some truly incredible months filled with lots of work and opportunity that I am very thankful for, but then with the snap of a finger the next month can be so much slower with not much happening at all. It's all just part of the game and the way it is, so I need to learn to be ok with all the lows just as much as I am ok with the highs. Easier said than done, I know, but it's possible. I also have this constant habit of overwhelming myself with all of the goals and dreams that I have. I literally have this "want it all" mentality. When things take a bit longer than expected, it can be frustrating and sometimes discouraging. I have to constantly remind myself to have patience and to remember that everything happens in its own time. I literally should tattoo this into my brain so that I don't forget it. I do have to say though that whenever I feel like I am getting to my lowest point, that is when something amazing comes along and picks me back up again. I believe that is both God and my Guardian Angel helping me to find my way again.
I am so anxious for my rebrand and relaunch, you have no idea. This is the exact change and boost that I need right now. I love the new direction that I am going to be taking and I hope that you all do too. Whenever I speak about my blog and get asked what topics I write about, I realize how happy I get whenever I mention this whole Life Chats series. My true passion has and always will be writing. I love being able to share my thoughts, struggles, and journey with all of you every single week and look forward to seeing where this can lead to next. I know I say this often, but your support is truly appreciated and never goes unnoticed. Thank you for always taking the time to read my posts and for coming back every day. So much love for you. Happy weekend. <3